Friday, March 22, 2024 — Star Sailor is Houston’s most important bar & restaurant.
In a city that was once blessed with multiple outstanding destinations to enjoy expertly handpicked craft beer lists and generous outdoor seating (yes, I’m still mourning Petrol Station and The Rancor Burger, RIP), the last half decade has been deeply unkind to the Houston craft beer bar scene.
Thankfully, Marin Slanina set out to change all that—in 2020 of all years. Star Sailor is located on 18th and Ella, maybe 500 feet away from arguably my other favorite restaurant in The Heights, Hughie’s, and between a thoughtfully curated draft wall and a mouth-watering menu, should be at the very top of your to-do list if you haven’t been yet (and also if you have).
But you’re here for the burger content. While I’d been to Star Sailor previously for drinks, the establishment landed back on my radar after compiling my Houston Burger Ranking spreadsheet, where it sits at #2 in the entire city. Had I known what I was missing out on I’d have rectified the situation much earlier.
Star Sailor’s menu is impressively deep, but they are best known for their Smashburger. I’ve recently been griping to friends about how I’ve been underwhelmed by several of the smashburgers I’ve had of late—burger-chan of course being the exception; the sandwiches that have incurred my indifference are the last several New York City hype burgers I’ve had during my trips back up north. This past week in particular I was thrilled to finally check Gotham Burger Social Club off during my less than 48 hours in Manhattan and it was…decidedly unmemorable, not to mention unfulfilling. Its saving grace was the ghost pepper ranch sauce—but Star Sailor’s outstanding Smashburger has changed my tune entirely.
I ordered a double patty (because obviously), and the burger came topped with melted cheese, delicious Stellar sauce, chopped onion & pickles. I also had to add an egg, bacon, and sautéed jalapeños (because of course).
First things first—not sure what blend of beef Marin is using, but it’s wonderfully savory and tender. One of my complaints about smashes is that the smash technique tends to eliminate any semblance of juiciness, but this had it in spades and was prepared with love, attention, and precision.
Another issue that arises with many smashes is that they don’t satiate properly—I was hungry enough after the Gotham Social experience that I still had room for three slices of sublime NYC pizza (with anchovies, yum)! I am happy to report that the Star Sailor Double Smash is generous enough to satisfy my seemingly limitless desire for over-the-top meat concoctions.
The only negative aspect of this latest burger adventure was that it ended too quickly—though that is of course on me as by now you know I eat faster than just about anyone.
Overall, Star Sailor’s mouthwatering Smash is beyond deserving of its aggregate #2 ranking in all of Houston by Houstonians. The only establishment ahead of it is burger-chan, and I also agree as I have burger-chan as my #1 in Houston as well.
I mentioned this during my unenthusiastic review of NYC’s Nowon, and the sentiment only continues to calcify as I continue to enjoy excellent local burger after excellent local burger: Houston is absolutely throttling my hometown in beef delivery transcendence. Now if only someone would revive The Rancor.
5 out of 5 patties 🍔 🍔 🍔 🍔 🍔
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