Month: March 2025

Friday, May 2, 2025 —

EaDo’s revered Moon Tower Inn—located just south of the Esplanade at Navigation—is a venerable Houston institution, having been around since 2010 (with some stops-and-starts, having undergone a few closings and renovations over the years).

I remember hitting it up for a growler fill not too long after we originally moved down to Houston from NYC in 2013, but I’d never previously sampled their burgers before—until now.

And I can’t believe it took me this long.

As an aside, that’s one of the problems when you let data influence your decisions—I’d long heard the burgers were great, but a 4.0 on Yelp (though a solid 4.6 on Google) meant there were other places I ended up seeking out ahead of it. Also having previously been to Moon Tower (even sans food) put a mental note in my head of it not being super-new for me. But I digress.

Today I rectified this particular void in my burger-loving existence, ordering up the Grim Creeper. Moon Tower describes the Grim Creeper as follows:

“Two 1/4-lb Angus beef smash patties, chipotle pimento cheese, bacon, roasted poblano peppers, bnb jalapeños, crispy fried onion, hellstard(tm) & grimm sauce(tm) on a brioche bun. You will probably regret it.”

First off, no way are these bad boys smashed. The patties were real-deal thick AF beef pucks—which, despite a recent tendency toward “true” smashes, are still my preference when it comes to a ground beef delivery vehicle.

The beef was juicy and tender AF, and the perfect canvas to deliver some of the best heat I’ve had at any Houston burger shop. Whatever they’re putting in the hellstard and grimm sauce is a spicy lover’s delight, and truly addictive. I could not get enough of it and was deeply sad after my burger was finished. Reminiscent of Lankford’s Grim Burger in both name and flavor, though I have to say — the last time I had Lankford’s Grim, it didn’t hit anywhere near as hard as Moon Tower’s Grim Creeper.

There’s a new spicy champ in town.

4.75 out of 5 patties 🍔 🍔 🍔 🍔 🍔

Friday, March 28, 2025 —

This week’s Friday Burger Adventure brought me to Stack Burger, located somewhat surprisingly in south Midtown just past 45 on Louisiana (703 St Joseph Pkwy, to be exact). I say surprisingly because despite the fact that Midtown is frequently a giant pain to navigate, this is still a pretty prime location for a burger joint in a freestanding building. I have to imagine one would need to sell a LOT of patties to keep up with the rent—especially when an establishment is closed on both Saturdays and Sundays!

Based on my experience today, however, that shouldn’t be too much of a problem for Stack. Their straightforward burger sandwich is mostly no-frills, featuring the basics of lettuce, tomato, onions, pickles, mayo, and cheese. Customization options are sparse—which longtime readers know is not my favorite as I like to pile my beef concoctions to the sky—and limited to an egg and bacon—but with a strong focus on the beef, you can see how it works. I couldn’t fund anything online about the beef blend or seasoning, but there was  an artfulness in the flavoring and cooking of the patties that leads me to believe someone back there knows their way around a grill.

The composition of the sandwich is comfortable, kind of like putting on an old sweater or the nostalgic analogy of your choice. And I really enjoyed the eggs—I’m not sure I’ve ever been served a burger with what appeared to be scrambled eggs instead of sunny-side-up or over-easy, and the texture and thickness really rounded each bite out with a little something extra.

Stack Burger originally hit my radar via Instagram, and not too soon after I saw a local influencer post about it being one of their favorite burgers in Houston. Between that, and the fact that, at 4.5 on Yelp and 4.6 on Google it’s the city’s 4th-highest-rated smashburger place (Stack Burger itself doesn’t call its burgers smash burgers, but the visual evidence doesn’t lie 😊)—and will actually rise up to 3rd after Star Sailor tragically closes after this weekend—it had been near the top of my to-do list for a while. And I’m glad I finally tried it.

Burger Stack is probably not in my top 15 burgers in Houston—and that’s certainly no knock, as the competition is fierce—but it might be top 20.

4.25 overall.

Friday, March 7, 2025 —

My never-ending quest to find the tastiest burgers in Houston finally led me to Gastrocraft, a northside Houston food bus owned and operated by the legendary Dennis Feray and his wife, April.

They’ve been slinging delicious comfort food since 2019, but it wasn’t until I began chronicling my burger adventures in earnest that I caught wind of Dennis’ smashburger, which is so visually appealing it should have its own IG account. And this is one smashburger that absolutely lives up to its mouth-watering appearance and then some.

I ordered up the 1-Star Double Smash, which comes with two smashed all-beef patties, American cheese, grilled sweet onions, and burger sauce on a toasted brioche bun. I added a third patty as I was feeling extra hungry, and of course, jalapeños. 

The beef is 73/27, and without knowing I guessed that it was seasoned with cayenne and paprika (among a few other spices), and was delighted to learn from Dennis that I was correct. Their patented burger sauce is mayo-based with ketchup, mustard, sriracha, black pepper, and pickle juice.

Let me tell you—this thing is a spice-forward beef hedonist’s dream come true! I’ve been loving dusting my own homemade patties with paprika and cayenne, and haven’t come across too many in the professional world with a similar heat-friendly mindset, so I was smitten from the get-go. Nor have I frequently encountered options with such a generous proportion of fat (how often do you see it in the 20s!). The heat from the spices was the perfect complement to the exceptionally expertly produced patties, cooked to charred precision and bursting with a saporous harmony of savoriness and umami magnificence.

Dennis has truly created an all-time singular Houston great with Gastrocraft’s smashburger—an offering that is among the most unique burger-consuming experiences I have had during this journey. The combination of spice, sauce and technical execution are beyond reproach, and the vast majority of Houston restaurants should be insanely jealous that they don’t offer this exquisite ode to beef consumption on their menus. The only downside is the relative level of difficulty in acquisition. I’d have checked them out much sooner if it wasn’t considerably further flung than the circles I usually travel in—their rotation of landing spots is generally in Humble/Atascosita and the surrounding areas. Petitioning now for a Gastrocraft outpost in Katy, please.

Per my Burger Rating spreadsheet, Gastrocraft ranks as the 19th-highest-rated burger in all of Houston, and 2nd-highest-rated food truck burger (behind only Umbrella Fellas, which I have yet to indulge in). In my opinion it is easily in Houston’s Top 10 overall, regardless of category.

This is one of the easier 5s I’ve given. Very nicely done! 🍔 🍔 🍔 🍔 🍔

Thursday, March 7, 2025 —

Following a year-plus of chronicling my Houston-area burger exploits—including more than 30 individual burger joint reviews, and one of the more comprehensive ratings spreadsheets you’ll find—I was flattered and humbled to be asked to attend the soft opening of Proper – A Burger Spot, the new burger concept at Finn Hall in Downtown’s iconic art-deco masterpiece, Jones on Main (712 Main St). 

Conceived of and launched by in-house Finn Hall chefs Joe Murphy, who was previously Executive Chef at Nobu Houston, Nobu Vegas, and Culinary Director of The Finn; and Michael Collantes, owner of Michelin-star-rated Soeseki Modern Omakase in Orlando, FL, Sushi Saint, and more; Proper boasts an extraordinary pedigree that naturally led to outsized expectations.

And boy, did they deliver. 

With smashburger purveyors in anything but short supply, it’s become increasingly challenging for a patty slinger to introduce a unique and delicious concept, and I’m thrilled to report that Chef Murphy and Chef Collantes have done just that.

The soft opening featured three options: The Proper Burger; Mushroom & Swiss; and Blue Cheese & Bacon. Longtime readers will recall that I am obsessed with the blue cheese & bacon combo, and it’s one you seldom—if ever—see among a sea of American Cheese-draped smashburgers throughout the scene. 

The mere concept of indulging in a Blue Cheese & Bacon smash alone was enough to activate my salivary glands—truly, I’m hard-pressed to think of a single smashburger joint that offers one in regular rotation—but then I received this work of art and chomped down on it. And I was whisked away to a charred-tastic juicy nirvana.

The Blue Cheese & Bacon comes standard with two 2.5-ounce patties delivered on a potato bun, the aforementioned eponymous toppings, plus smoked romaine lettuce and A1 Bone Marrow Sauce. Fairly certain I’ve never had the latter before, and now I want it on everything. 

The beef—an 80/20 brisket and chuck blend—was exquisitely seasoned and cooked to perfection, with beautiful char ringing the perimeter. If you like your smashburgers bursting with juicy flavor—a difficult feat considering a common critique of the very act of smashing would seem to diminish excessive succulence—Proper is your new go-to.

I also tried the Proper Fries, which were thick-cut and smothered in bacon, American cheese, and their signature Proper Sauce, comprised of a mustard-mayo-ketchup amalgam adorned with mustard-green-pickles (also known as takana).

Proper is an early contender for top new burger in all of Houston for 2025, and not just because I was invited to preview it. You just don’t find Bacon & Blue Cheese smashburgers on many menus, nor burgers crafted this expertly. There’s an elevated level of polish, sophistication and care in the ingredients, preparation, cooking and presentation that not many can match. Extremely, highly recommended.

An easy 5 out of 5. 🍔 🍔 🍔 🍔 🍔