Best Burgers Near Me

Month: February 2024

  • Offbeat local fast food franchise Hippo Burger lives up to its name

    Offbeat local fast food franchise Hippo Burger lives up to its name

    Friday, February 23, 2024 — On the heels of my not-as-amazing-as-I’d-hoped experience at Flip ’n Patties on my actual birthday this past week, I found myself craving a beef topping combo I know and love. Specifically, a blue cheese and bacon burger.

    For the seemingly zillion hamburger options in Houston, there are surprisingly few that offer a blue cheese option. And there seem to be even fewer that let you customize to your heart’s content.

    As I studied my burger list to determine where my next adventure would take me, I had three criteria: I definitely wanted it to be a burger joint, not a restaurant with a notable burger. I wanted it to be near the top of the ratings, as I work my way down from highest to lowest. And if it didn’t have blue cheese as a substitute, it at least needed to offer a burger sandwich that came topped with blue cheese in its description.

    It didn’t take me long to identify the location that met all three: Hippo Burgers. Hippo’s been on my list for a while, but given its relatively far-flung locations—it actually has 10(!) outposts in the greater Houston area, though the closest to the Galleria is still a 25-minute ride away—it kept getting backburnered.

    To my delight, one of Hippo’s primary offerings is the Hippo Blue Burger, and at a 4.3 Yelp / 4.6 Google ranking, Hippos is the 13th-highest rated Hamburger Joint in Houston. With only four places ahead of it I haven’t tried yet, Hippo was the clear choice to satisfy my high-rated blue cheese craving.

    However, before diving into the meat, I’d be remiss if I didn’t comment on the Hippo experience. I’m not sure if they all share the same appearance, but the one on the Sam Houston Tollway is connected to a gas station mini mart, and the yellow interior decor—and even the logo!—are eerily evocative of Kevin Smith’s View Askewniverse fast food satire Mooby’s. 

    Despite placing my order in advance, I still had to wait in a line while in-person customers ordered ahead of me, due to there being one cashier. Efficiency is not the name of the game at Hippo. One last quirk — one of Hippo’s differentiators is apparently photographing (and serving!) their burgers upside-down. For the life of me I’m not entirely sure what this is meant to accomplish, though it’s something to talk about.

    Anyway, on to the savory (I’d say juicy, but this burger was decided not) details! Right out of the gate I knew I’d be happy with this substantially sized hamburger sandwich, especially after the petite presentation of Flip ‘n’s Puet Burger. 

    The Hippo Blue Burger is comprised of a 1/2 pound Angus beef patty, bacon, bleu cheese, mayo, lettuce, and tomatoes. I added mustard, ketchup, pickles, jalapeños, and a fried egg, delivered on a generously sized (upside down) potato bun. For me, this specific combination of toppings is almost as good as it gets—had they offered banana peppers, it would’ve been an all-time Larry burger.

    As it stands, the sandwich overall was enjoyable, primarily because of the heft of the patty and the glorious synergy of the toppings. I could’ve used even more blue cheese crumbles and maybe another strip of bacon, but the flavor mix was mostly on point, and I was also glad I added jalapeños (and received more than one this time!) for some much-needed heat.

    Alas, similar to my recent experience with Crypto Burger, the toppings really stole the show, as the meat itself was dry and overcooked. A bit reminiscent of Whataburger (which, I like Whataburger! But I also know exactly what I’m getting myself into when eating at Whataburger, and that is a beef patty more arid than a Houston summer day). 

    Still, overall I really enjoyed finally trying Hippo, and while I wouldn’t go out of my way, I’d definitely eat it again. The more I dive into this burger adventure, the fewer places I’ve come across that allow the level of full-blown customization that Hippo does (the only enhancement I didn’t see was the ability to add a second patty — not that this particular beef monster needed a friend, but I always appreciate having the option to go full-on gorge). In my experience, Hippo’s modification options are rivaled only by those of burger-chan‘s.

    4.25 out of 5 patties.

  • Not quite flippin’ out for Flip ‘n Patties

    Not quite flippin’ out for Flip ‘n Patties

    Thursday, February 22, 2024 — Like several of the Houston culinary scene’s success stories, Flip ‘n Patties began life as a popular food truck with a mission statement of “To bring happiness to your heart by sharing Filipino flavors and culture.” In 2017 it made the leap to brick-and-mortar, and currently boasts not one but two locations in the Houston area — one in Downtown, and the other in the Energy Corridor on Eldridge.

    I learned of Flip n’ Patties’ existence by way of Reddit (if you’re ever looking for an endless supply of local recommendations, just Google “Houston’s best burgers” and in addition to the usual roundups from area publications you’ll also surface ~8,000 Reddit threads), and it quickly laddered its way up my to-do list after discovering it carried a 4.6 Yelp / 4.7 Google rating. I recently added categories to my spreadsheet — Hamburger Joint, Smashburger, and Restaurant with a Notable Burger — and Flip n’ Patties ranks as the #3 spot in all of Houston in the Restaurant w/Notable Burger arena (I wrestled a bit with this grouping, as Flip ‘n does have a hamburger in its logo, but ultimately the wide range and diversity of the entirety of the menu landed it in full-blown restaurant territory for me). 

    Top 3 means I went in with pretty high expectations.

    Were they met? Unfortunately, it fell a little short for me. 

    Let’s start with the good: the steamed buns — handcrafted and made fresh daily — might be the tastiest at any establishment that serves a hamburger in Houston. I’d never previously had a hamburger served to me on such a vehicle, and the flavor and texture were evocative of dining on delicious pork buns. Unfortunately the composition of the bun is also not entirely conducive to fully holding up to the weight and juiciness of the contents inside, but it was hard to be too disappointed about a slightly soggy bun when the flavor was so enjoyable.

    The not so good: there were several extremely appealing-sounding burgers on the menu, and it was a challenge to make a selection. I went with the Puet Burger, comprised of Akaushi beef (I’ve of course had Wagyu, but this was a new blend to me), diced pecan smoked pork butt, sautéed onions, provolone, houseblend mayo, and FnP tang sauce. I asked if I could add jalapeños, which they agreed to, but somewhat surprisingly declined my request for a second patty. I also thought the recipe’s inclusion of provolone was a bit odd, as in my experience provolone is fine, but doesn’t generally add much flavor-wise. 

    (Sidebar: the deeper I get into my burger quest, I’m increasingly finding that most cheese varieties don’t actually seem to shine in a saporous manner during the overall burger-consumption experience. Don’t get me wrong — I’m never going to not order cheese on my burger — but unless it’s something notably piquant, like blue cheese or extra sharp cheddar, cheese’s role in the topping taste profile of many burgers seems to be more of a gooey, secondary, texture-based one than a scene-stealing star turn).

    Unfortunately the sandwich struggled to overcome my preconceived notions. The beef blend did indeed have the melt-in-your-mouth richness hallmark of Akaushi — but the patty was smaller than anticipated. Those of you that have broken bread with me know I tend to eat as though I literally just discovered food, but this was inhaled expediently even for me — maybe four bites, tops. I really would’ve loved a second patty. The pork butt got a bit lost amid the onions and sauces, and I’m not sure my addition of jalapeños came to fruition — I think I spotted just one. And as expected, the provolone was invisibly bland.

    It’s very possible the Puet Burger just wasn’t for me. I thought the beef was flavorful enough that I’d be willing to give a different burger composition at Flip ‘n Patties another try at some point, but I wouldn’t go out of my way for it (don’t even get me started on how much of a nightmare it is to navigate Eldridge Street during rush hour!). I would be very curious to assemble an Akaushi patty with my preferred toppings of blue cheese, bacon, pickled jalapeños and onions, banana peppers, pickles, ketchup, lettuce, tomato, mustard, and mayo, and as I’m typing this out I might need to fire up the grill and do just that this weekend.

    I’m not sure it’s entirely fair to rate a restaurant based on the one thing you ordered when there are multiple other options available in its cohort, but on the flip side I’m also not ordering five different hamburgers everywhere I go (as much as I would love to). I’m giving it a 4, which may sound generous after I spent most of the review dinging it, but the quality of the beef and bun kept it from being a total letdown. 

    And on to the next burger adventure!

  • JLB Eatery yet another winner in Katy’s increasingly exceptional burger scene

    JLB Eatery yet another winner in Katy’s increasingly exceptional burger scene

    Saturday, February 17, 2024 — With my birthday coming up I knew I wanted to knock a few more new burger spots off of my to-do list. Not that I ever need an excuse to seek new hamburgers out, but the celebratory vibe of one’s day of birth ensured my attention was focused at the top of my spreadsheet to see which highly-regarded joints would make the cut. 

    At a 4.8 on both Yelp and Google, JLB Eatery (which has 12 Houston-area locations) is the highest-rated burger place in Katy. The only reason I hadn’t been sooner is that, in some regards, I figured I’d already had their food. Being the burger obsessive that I am, naturally I’ve previously eaten at Joy Love Burger numerous times (and have always loved it), but JLB Eatery appears to technically be a separate entity from Joy Love Burger. 

    I’m generally a pretty successful internet sleuth, but information around what exactly occurred to lead Chef Joon Jeon to leave the restaurant he founded — the original Joy Love Burger — and open a new one called JLB Eatery is surprisingly hard to come by, but as best I can tell the two establishments operate independently and despite Chef Jeon’s utilization of the JLB acronym, appear to have completely distinct ownership groups. Aside from that, the menus are very, very similar. 

    Which means I wasn’t surprised for one moment that I absolutely loved JLB Eatery! The only slight hiccup was that ordering at the counter and the subsequent arrival of the food was a bit more sluggish than I’d prefer (would definitely order ahead online next time), but the staff was so lovely and accommodating during what was clearly a busy Friday night that it was no big deal.

    I ordered the Crazy Burger, which consists of two MASSIVE double certified Angus beef patties, double cheese, mayonnaise, lettuce, pickles, tomatoes, bacon, grilled onions, and thousand island dressing. This thing is absolutely GARGANTUAN (unfortunately my photo does not do it justice) — no joke it is probably a 2,000-calorie hamburger sandwich.

    And holy crap was it delicious! Everything I recall loving about Joy Love Burger is beyond represented in JLB Eatery’s loving ode to beefy extravagance. I know I keep mentioning the size, but if you like gigantic, juicy melt-in-your mouth hamburgers, I’m not sure you’ll find a happier place than JLB. I thought the beef flavor might get overwhelmed by all of the delicious accoutrement — the thousand-island dressing is off the charts, and it is absolutely slathered in bacon, pickles and onions — but it remained the star of the show throughout, resplendent in savory, soft, beefy deliciousness. Texturally exquisite and cooked to perfection. And no conversation about JLB Eatery is complete without highlighting the bun — in addition to cooking insanely great hamburgers, Chef Jeon is also a pattisier and so JLB bakes all of their buns fresh daily. We’ve all had experiences where the bun can occasionally be an afterthought, but at JLB it’s almost as big a draw as the meat itself. I inhaled this thing and didn’t look back. 

    And I also ordered the Steak Fries, because how can you not when they come smothered in philly steak, cheese, onions, lettuce, and jalapeños? Similar to Crypto Burger’s Spicy Metaverse Monster Fries, this enormous side could easily be a meal unto its own, and I took the whole thing down as well (thank goodness I knew I had an 8-mile run ahead of me the next morning 😂). 

    Overall, I was utterly delighted (and beyond satiated!) by my experience at JLB Eatery, and it absolutely lives up to its aggregated online ratings as Katy’s best burger. Just make sure you go there on the emptiest stomach possible! And my goodness is Katy currently flush with exceptional hamburger choices these days—between Old School Burger,  Fusion, Kowbell, JLB (and even original Joy Love), elevated options for the beef-loving denizens of Katy are plentiful. 

    Five out five patties. 🍔🍔🍔🍔🍔

  • Don’t miss hype Houston food truck Crypto Burger’s crave-worthy FOMO sauce

    Don’t miss hype Houston food truck Crypto Burger’s crave-worthy FOMO sauce

    Friday, February 9, 2024 — Traveling Houston-area burger purveyors Crypto Burger hit my Instagram feed last fall with mouth-watering photos of their delicious-looking burgers, and I finally popped over to the food truck park on Chimney Rock in the Galleria to see what all the fuss was about.

    Anticipating a line, the entire park—which also features another burger food truck catty corner from Crypto—was instead surprisingly barren for lunchtime on a Friday. I debated between their fan favorite Bunque Burger and the Bull Run, and ended up ordering the latter. 

    Bull Run is described as a “Homemade beef patty, topped with Serrano peppers, beef bacon, fried onions, cayenne pepper hot sauce, shredded Colby jack cheese, and our spicy FOMO sauce.” 

    It took a bit longer for my order—which, because I am a glutton for all things meat, also included the Spicy Metaverse Monster Fries, a gigantic platter of fries that could easily serve as a meal unto its own absolutely smothered with ground beef, grilled jalapeños, and FOMO sauce—to be completed than I expected, though you can’t quibble with a fresh-grilled burger.

    As you can see by my photo, the patty is drenched in the FOMO sauce and it is truly the star of the show. A pleasant zippiness, but not overwhelmingly spicy where it blows your palate out. The beef blend itself was enjoyable, though the overall flavor got a little lost amidst all of the other awesomeness accompanying it. The bun was fluffy and also hefty enough to stand up to the onslaught of toppings—always a plus.

    Overall I was glad to have finally checked Crypto off my neverending list. While I don’t  think it cracks my top five in Houston—though in fairness, that’s a difficult list to enter!—and food trucks seem to be the recipient of a generous grading curve by the review-leaving public, I would definitely eat it again. 4 out of 5 patties.